A little revising, good for the soul

My students are in the thick of it now. Our memoirs are well under way. As a teacher, this is very interesting as I see student memoirs developing. Even at this point in the year, I am learning about my students and their thought process. Next year, I might start the year writing a quick memoir, then go back to it at the end and revisit.

So about revision... Every day now, I am teaching my students another technique to revise. We go back and reread, then use a strategy to make our work better. I model the technique for them on my own memoir, then send them to do the same with their own.

Some ways we revise:

• add color words/descriptive language
• dialogue - add some or take some out if they are a kid who overdoes it with dialogue
• repetition of a phrase or word
• add action/sound words
• speed up the action
• slow down the action

I could go on forever, but I won't. You get my point. We so often skimp on the revision aspect, when, in fact, it is crucial to great writing to spend the time. Do the work. Get your knuckles dirty (to quote a lacrosse coach).

I find that fourth grade is an excellent time to teach kids to take their time, expend the energy and make a piece of writing the best it can be. Then make it better. When it's the best it can possibly be, go back and make it EVEN BETTER!

Marley & Memoirs

We are back at it this week. We've been reading Marley & Me together, examining the in and outs of what makes a great memoir. My favorite chapter is Chapter 5, "A Battle of Wills." I so enjoy the image of John and Jenny taking Marley to obedience classes and the tribulations of doing so. Ahhh, been there with my own dog, done that. My class was just giggling in fits, listening to the chapter. (Fourth graders particularly enjoy any story that has pet poop in it -- this one is a crowd pleaser!) 

So now that we are about 7 chapters in, now, my little friends can begin making a list of possible memoirs that they could write. I start them off with "My Life as a..." I ask them to come up with 15 or 20 possibilities. Their eyes get as big as saucers until I share some of my possible titles. "My life as  a.." ...mother of soldiers; ...gardener ...cookie baker ...big sister ... little sister. All the facets of my life could become the focus of my memoir.

My little friends come up some very original ideas: "My Life as a..." 

...Nature Lover

...Traveler

...Fisherman 

...Hip Hop Dancer

...Hamster Owner

...Pastor's Daughter

Good stuff! They come up with all of this on their own.

Tomorrow we begin drafting. They have to choose one topic from their list. They have to be able to  write about three incidents relating to the topic. They also must have a message they would like to convey to the reader. Naturally, they have to craft their writing so that the message is evident, but not directly stated.

It seems like a heavy load for a 9 year old writer, but it's not. They love it, and they rise to the occasion. I can't wait for tomorrow!

Marvelous memoirs

At this point in the year, my students always begin writing their memoir.  It's time to start reflecting on our school year, on our work as writers and on our lives. You'd be surprised how reflective a 10 year-old can be. And how wise.

We always connect our work to a mentor text. Writing memoirs is not different. Together we read the book, Marley & Me,  by John Grogan, which is mostly funny, but has bittersweet moments. (We read the children's version - Marley & Me, A Dog Like No Other, it's shorter, geared to children). The combination entertains the  kids, but gets them thinking about the bigger picture in life.

A memoir is the story of one's life, but slanted to tell a specific tale. It isn't a chronological list of events. Rather it's choosing which events you share, based on the message you want to send your readers. We all have many facets to our life. I'm a wife, mother, daughter and sister -- the events I write about are different depending on the part of my life I choose to focus on. 

For the first few days, probably all this coming week, we'll read a couple chapters a day, "donating" a good chunk of our writing time to reading Marley. We need to get a head start before they start penning their memoirs. Sometimes the work of writing is reading, almost like we are researching. Sometimes our work in writing is thinking. We can't just spew words on a page. There is a good bit to be done before we start.

So tomorrow, off we go to write about our lives...

A Last Word on Letters...

Once we finish our letters to our friends, we will finish our letter writing by writing a letter to an incoming 4th grade student for the next school year. I have two friends that have done this over the years in their fifth grade classes, and I think it's a very nice end-of-year wrap up. 

Even though we aren't that close to the end of the year, we aren't that far from it either. While we are on this letter writing topic, now seems as good a time as any to write those letters. That will be one end-of-year task done!

Students can start by introducing themselves, telling their reader what they enjoyed about 4th grade, what was a challenge for them this year, and offer some words of advice. This is a nice reflective piece that helps students as they gain an understanding of just how much they have achieved this year. By completing the letters now, they can bask in their achievements for the remaining weeks of the year.

My challenge: remember where I put the letters so I can pull them out in September!

Let Them Help You Revise…

It’s scary to put your written work on the line, or more correctly, up on the electronic whiteboard. Making your words public is one of the bravest things I can imagine anyone doing. When you write, and let others read your writing, you lay your soul bare for the criticism of others, good or bad. Even if your audience is a room full of 10-year-olds, it can be scary.

Few teachers feel confident enough to routinely put their work in front of students or ask others to read our work and pass judgment on that work. Authors often find the editing process in publishing (which is really revision) the most painful part of the process. You have to let someone in, and let them pick at your words, and make suggestions, which is like letting them take a crack at your soul.

In the classroom, I like to write a piece with the kids sitting right there watching. Whatever type of writing we do, it’s helpful for the kids to watch me struggle with it. They often make suggestions if I get “stuck” for a word. We have that relationship. If I ask them to let me help them with their writing, I’d better be ready to reciprocate – seek their help. When I go back and revise – or re-see – my work, I always choose a particular lens to “see” it through. I take numerous opportunities to revise a piece. The more important the piece is, the more time I spend revising it.

We are working on friendly letters this week, writing to someone at our school. The letter I modeled for students is a letter to my boss, the principal.

I thought I had done a pretty decent job with the writing, until the students and I sat down to take a look. I read it aloud, and just to give them a hint of where I was going, I began emphasizing the each place where I began a sentence with the word “I.” In my best dramatic voice, I said to them: “I, I, I …Gosh it looks like this letter is all about ME, doesn’t it? Friends, help me fix this and make it better” I pointed out the sentences, then I asked the kids to help me. Well! Ask and you shall receive!

They read over the sentences thoughtfully and began to offer me many great suggestions. Changes were made, many changes, actually. The need product was a much better letter. That’s the whole point of the exercise. Once they see that my own work could be made better, they are much more willing to go back and work on their own. Truly, if they see that I seriously take my own advice and do the actual work of revision, it legitimizes the task for them. The end result is much, much higher quality final copies.

Here are my first and final drafts. All changes were directed by my students….

First draft

                                                              April 23, 2012

Mrs. Makowski

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Dear Mrs. Makowski;

            I hope this letter finds you well. I have been wanting to write to you for a long

time. I'd like to let you know some things about Pinehurst that are fabulous.

            Something that is really great about Pinehurst is that the students are great

readers. They work very hard to choose good books, and they spend a lot of time reading

independently. Sentz-sational!

            Another thing I really like about Pinehurst is that the teachers are very friendly

and helpful. They have made me feel so welcome this year. I have made many new friends

since I arrived in September.

            I want you to know that you are an excellent principal. I like the assemblies and

activities you plan for the students. You do a great job helping the students learn and

keeping students safe. It is a pleasure to come to work. It doesn't seem like work at all.

It's fun to teach at Pinehurst!

            I think Pinehurst is a great place for students and teachers. These are just some

of the reasons I am glad to be a Pinehurst teacher. 

Sincerely,

Mrs. Sentz

Second draft:

                                                              April 23, 2012

Mrs. Makowski

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Dear Mrs. Makowski;

            I hope this letter finds you well. I have wanted to write to you for a long

time. I'd like to let you know some things about Pinehurst that are fabulous.

            Something that is really spectacular about Pinehurst is that the students are great

readers. They work very hard to choose good books, and they spend a lot of time reading

independently. Sentz-sational!

            Another thing that is really splendid about Pinehurst is that the staff and students

are very friendly and helpful. They have made me feel so welcome this year. They have

made me feel very comfortable since I arrived in September.

            Did you know that you are an excellent principal? We all enjoy the assemblies

and activities you plan for the students. You do a great job helping the students learn and

keeping students safe. It is a pleasure to come to work. It doesn't seem like work at all. It's

fun to teach at Pinehurst!

            As you can see, I think Pinehurst is an extraordinary place for students and

teachers. These are just some of the reasons I am glad to be a Pinehurst teacher. It's a

once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Your friend,

Mrs. Sentz

P.S. The Sentz-sational students in Room 110 helped with the revision of this letter.

They are Sentz-sational Smarties!

Begin the year with Bubble lessons

Every September, one of the first things I do with my class is to take my class outside to blow bubbles. I try to do it on the very first day because it makes it memorable. It’s a great photo opportunity that is a hit with parents on Parent Information Night.

Yes, ten-year olds typically think they are much too sophisticated for bubbles, but alas, they love it. It sets the stage for a whole bunch of writing lessons! This bubble business is one of those things that can cross many instructional areas.

Before we talk about the writing connection, here a few other areas bubble blowing can connect to:

• It can be scientific. As you talk about bubble methodology (use a wand or a paper tube – see what happens!), make a hypothesis, observe the bubbles, and record observations.

• For a math connection, remember, first of all, a bubble is a sphere. You can time the floating time of a bubble, calculate elapsed time, etc. Count and graph how many bubbles blown in 30 seconds or 1 minute. Be creative!

• Here is why I do bubbles the first day – I make a connection to the thought process of students. Bubbles have a lot in common with thinking. Thoughts are like bubbles. Some we watch and float away. Others we chase down, catch and make bigger. Some bubbles lead to greater things – double bubbles, triple, etc.

Day 1: we head outside, armed with paper tubes, standard bubble wands and anything else we think will make a good bubble device. We make our own bubble solution just to prove we can. We work in pairs or triads (make new friends, learn to work together) and spend quite a long time enjoying bubbles.

When we come in, we spend a good bit of time discussing what we did, what we observed. We write everything on big chart paper. Then we do a carousel activity. I put headings on the pages, such as “Words that Describe Bubbles,” “What Bubbles Do,” “How Bubbles Move,” “Bubbles are like”  “Bubbles Are…” etc. (Later these are the foundation for lessons on synonyms, adjectives, similes/metaphors) I mix the groups up again into threes or fours. Each starts at a different chart, then rotate on my signal after a few minutes.

Down the Road: This initial work is so important to the foundational work for writing. We can keep going back the lists we generated that first day and use it again and again. With a little thought to what mini lessons you plan to teach, you can make your charts accordingly. I try to get the basics – nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, plus a few other things such as similes and metaphors. You can squeeze a lot of goodness out of this beginning activity.

The bubble lesson can be a springboard for writing a procedural text, poetry, a piece of fiction, or a reflective narrative piece that would make a great scrapbook page.

With bubbles, the sky is the limit!  

Inspiration, Tools, Tricks

Inspiration, Tools, Tricks

When you teach writing, you are always on the prowl for the next cool gizmo or gadget to delight young writers and make their pencils fly. Even better if that tool is FREE. Who doesn’t love free?

I am one of those weirdos who can’t pass a rest area without grabbing a stack of maps, brochures, or flyers for tourist attractions because I might “need them someday.” My family has become more accepting of my quirky, pack rat-ish behavior. My kids just pretend they are with someone else, but my husband has come to the place of true acceptance. He even indulges me in my squirreling away tendencies. Now that is LOVE.

So….one day, I was in a local hardware store perusing the paint section when my eye fell on one of the greatest freebies I have ever come to know. Paint chips!!! I had no need of paint, and I had no reason to start grabbing chips. I walked down the aisle, and there amidst the sea of blues, reds, greens and yellows, was the ultimate teacher treasure. I almost can’t believe it to this very day, my good fortune was such. Some innovative paint company struck a deal with Crayola and made vibrant paint intended for children’s rooms. Then they took it over the top and put the paint colors on chips shaped like the top of crayons. Genius!!!!

I couldn’t help myself. They were so stinking cute, I grabbed a few, random colors that appealed to me. Knowing full well my own children were beyond the age these were being marketed to, I felt like I was stealing, but I didn’t care. I was like a moth to the flame. I couldn’t go home without a small stack in my hand.

When I got home, I showed my husband sheepishly. “Look what I found?” He has learned to mirror whatever pleased look I have on my face. Whether he is as amazed by whatever new freebie comes my way, he knows better than to not share my enthusiasm. “Oh, wow. Now what did you get those for?”

“Writing, of course.” How could he not see the possibilities bundled in my outstretched hand? I often have to remember that he is not in the field, so he might not immediately get it. “Oh, for writing…. Well, good, Honey.” I could see he wasn’t seeing the big picture.

Paint chips are an amazing tool when you want to teach a lesson on revising, adding “color” words. Did you ever notice the names printed on the chips? Cerulean blue, Forest Moss, Puffy Cloud, Strawberry Shake, and the list goes on and on.

Armed with my paint chips, I’ve done whole lessons on putting color into a piece of writing. Paint chips are just plain fun for student writers. Sometimes I pass out chips randomly to students and ask them to incorporate that color into their writing.

The possibilities are endless. What would you do with  stack of pain chips?